What Your Chairlift Vice Says About You
By Stan Leveille
The following article was originally printed in the October 2025 Issue of Slush. To get more articles and subscribe, click here.
You can tell a lot about a rider by what they do off the board—how they wait, how they walk, how they fill the silence between hits. And nowhere is that more revealing than the chairlift.
It’s the in-between moment, the floating confessional, the high-altitude therapy session where vices come out of pockets and true selves get revealed. Chairlift cravings clue your core—discover what yours says about you!
Chairlift Beer
You romanticize struggle. You ride hungover like it’s a flex and your friends either think you’re hilarious or deeply concerning. Either way, you’ll never say no to “one more run” or “one more round.”
Joint
You operate on a frequency no one else understands—and that’s kind of the point. You talk about spots like they’re sacred geometry. You’ll land something incredible or not try at all. Every third sentence you speak is either a proverb or a giggle. You are both the chillest and least dependable person in the crew.
Snus / Zyn
You have a crippling addiction, but you keep it clean, quiet, and tucked behind your lip like it’s a secret strength. You’re not trying to be flashy about it—you just genuinely believe this pouch is the difference between landing and slamming. You tell yourself it helps you focus. No one really knows how many you go through in a day, and that’s exactly how you like it.
Spliff
You are not the weed guy. You believe in balance—head high, toe edge, a touch of tobacco. You have opinions about café culture, VX footage, and how everyone’s doing it wrong these days. You ride good enough that people put up with your constant commentary. You’ll spend the entire lift talking about a part from 2011, then go do one trick all day—and it’s perfect.
Cigarette
You are timeless. You’ve been “over it” since 2009 and everyone sort of respects that. You land like a sack of bricks but somehow still look cool doing it. Your outerwear has holes, your clips have heart, and you once threw a snowball at a drone mid-filming.
Vape
You talk in memes, land bolts, and will absolutely cry if your story gets less than 1,000 views. Your hoodie never touches your waist, and your vape is somehow always fully charged. You're the future, unfortunately.
Your Phone
You’re physically on the chairlift, but spiritually in the meta verse. You check signal between towers and panic-scroll like the algorithm might abandon you mid-run. You filmed your last trick vertical because you “might clip it later,” and your pocket buzz means more than the wind in your face. Deep down, you know snowboarding is the one place you shouldn’t be staring at a screen—but the grip of the grid is real. Try letting go. The Wi-Fi will still be there. The moment won’t.
Trail Mix
You are dangerously wholesome. Like, suspiciously so. You talk about “fuel” instead of snacks and say things like “this pow feels alive.” You somehow always have just what someone else forgot—extra gloves, wax, electrolytes, empathy. Your goggles are always clean and your spirit unnervingly intact. Everyone loves you, but no one wants to room with you on the next trip. Too much morning energy. Too many almonds.
The Trail Map
This is your one big trip and, goddammit, you will make the most of it. You’re on a strict schedule built around lift efficiency and vertical feet. You’ve highlighted routes, timed lunches, and have a backup plan if the wind picks up. You refer to the resort by zones (“We’ll hit 7B after this, then traverse to Sector C”) and you keep asking the crew if they’re “down to hustle a little.” You are universally admired and quietly resented.
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